I Do Not Feel Wanted

Lately I have been feeling like an outsider because in my apartment I have not been getting along with my roommates. Every walk in the door and find them talking its as if I ruined their day just through my presence. I hate feeling unwanted and unwelcomed in my home it is the worst feeling I have ever experienced. When I told my boyfriend what was going on he suggested to talk to them as soon as possible before things got worst but I was too scared. Now that I have had all my feelings bottled up my attitude is insupportable I can not stand to be in the same room as them. I know I speak soon but I can not do it, it us like someone is holding my mouth shut. My experience here is not like I thought it would be I love my school my I hate my home. I truly hope this does not have an impact on my chances to come back next year.
My roommate is supposed to be my friend and lately I do not feel warmth from her as if she has gone against me as well. This is one of things that hurts the most because I have been there for her when she needed me and now that I need her she is no around me. I know all of this can be resolved as long as I talk but this is hard for me. I have made it my goal to talk before I lose a friend.

I Think I know how to Play?

Over the summer part of the workout at my job was to play football with the guys since they outnumbered the girls. I am not usually the one to be a "pink lady" but playing football is a harsh game, but that did not stop me. I decided to give a try even though I do not know not one thing about the rules nor how you play. All I knew was to run and tackle my opponent. And every time I did that I fell and either scratched myself or my opponent. I must admit it was pretty fun it was more interesting for me because I did not know how to play so I did not take it seriously unlike the guys they got mad when their team did not score. So every time we did a play I asked the guys to explain to me exactly what I had to do in order to succeed in the game and they would explain to me. So now I still do not know nothing about football but I do know I enjoyed the game and it was a new experience for me.

I Know I Can Do Better

Man Last weeks paper was the paper I have ever devoted so much time to, I literally sat in front of the computer for about 11 hours straight. Now I know that may seem unbelievable but I did take bathroom and snack breaks. I tried to follow all the tips my teacher and T.A. offered and follow the things we had discussed in class but yesterday I got my paper and I did worst than I thought I missed a lot of details. I guess I over thought the paper and my teacher because as I reading through the comments she wrote it turns I am not that much of a bad writer and all I need is to tune up. Yes, I do have things I need to work on but who does not? I got a B- on paper and in my opinion is not as bad as I thought it was going to be. Lisa said that I need to work on how I put my sentences together along with some other pointers. I am feeling a bit more nervous about this upcoming paper though because the article is a more difficult reading and I am not sure how will I do on this assignment. But I will give it my all even if it means to stay in front of his computer for 13 hours.

It Was College Enrollment Season

Think back to your senior year in high school and when you came across those two frightening essays your personal statement and the professional essay was it not one of the most confusion essays you ever had to do? The questions could not be in any more clear but to us or at least for me I was so nervous that I could not think of what to write I know that it was asking me things that I should know the answer to but I had to give the best impression anyone has ever made. So many thoughts went through my head that I did not know where to start I knew what I had to say but I did not know how to say it.
Becoming part of the University of Illinois was my priority and I had my mind set on doing whatever it took to become a student at this school. In order to do this I had to modify the I presented myself and my language. I could not just talk as I am accustomed to I had to put my best foot forward and so I did I talked about myself like I never had it almost seemed as if I was conceited. The office of admission had to see why they needed me to be part of their school and how much I can bring to the table. It seems like my hard work paid off because I am here typing in my room and part of the U of I student body.

The Mindset of a Freshie

As I enter my college classrooms it is no different than the routine I am used to; get there on time, greet your professors, and sit attentively. I do have to recognize that the mindset is different though because in high school some classes did not require my full attention because they were very laid back and I could afford to be distracted unlike my courses here I have to always be prepared to learn and focus. In high school and even grammar school I did not see the harm in a "C" sometimes even a "D" but now that I am in college and see how each and every grade I earn is a contribute to my goal I see the value in it and I work harder for it.
The mindset a student carries into any environment varies the results they bring. I had to learn the hard that when you do not bring an open mind to knowledge you lose a lot more than a lesson from a teacher you can lose a piece of mind and in my book that is worth more. Now that I am in college I look forward to every class eager to the new discussion in class. I have learned that my mindset affects my focus and the chances of getting a better understanding of what is being taught.
Mindsets contribute a lot to a class if every student did not have the mindset to learn in a classroom then there really would not be any point for the professors to teach anything for no one is willing to learn. As part of my new mindset as a college student I tend to sit front of the class to get the most out of my class and to. It makes a difference in the shape my life as a student takes and the course my classes take on me.

Remember Those Happy Days?

God I miss those good old days! Remember when we had no worries? I remember playing with Barbie dolls, playing house, and hide-n-go seek all those moments will forever stay in my head. I remember when I used to wish I was grown up so that no one told me what to do but now as I have gotten older I see why my mom always told me to never be in a rush to grow up. Do not get me wrong I love the things I get to do now that I am older but I miss having no worries about life. Living as if nothing ever was wrong or as they say in Spanish vivir la vida como si fuera color de rosa which live life as if it were in a pink shade(perfect).
As life gets longer I trip and fall harder and harder and it makes getting up all that more difficult. I know that I will be able to get back up but I just do not know when will be my last fall. When will I reach my fulfillment in life? Now that I have my niece and nephew I would want them to ever have to go through the hardships my brother and I had to go through as kids. I understand that they have to go through their own things but I just wish they would forever stay as they are, young and innocent.
I miss those days and I know that when I have my kids I am going to have them live those days like if there was no tomorrow. Let them eat ice cream until they throw up, ride in the tea cups until the world is upside down, and take them to Disney World. I will try my best to give those kids everything that I could not have. Now I know what they mean by your only a kid once in life, because after that you get older and older until your wrinkled and can not walk anymore.